What ho, Universe!!

Yes, it is I, Monique. I, who was certain that computers were so 1998. Indeed, while it does not happen often, I can certainly admit when I am wrong. For instance, coffee enemas, despite my assertions to the contrary, are not for everyone.

Now, as I leap into the web of the world, I had to think carefully about my methods. I could Tweet of course, but perhaps that would make me TOO accessible. Plus, the name is juvenile and makes me think of a round yellow bird who is in great need of aerobic exercise.

I could join Facebook, and in fact I did at one time. But it was too disheartening when I had 5,653 “not attending” responses to my cabaret performance at the 59th Street Subway Platform. I know my Grandmother’s comments regarding the fact that she was going to use the performance as an opportunity to solicit signatures for her “Arm the Children” campaign was off-putting, but she said if I defriended her, my trust fund was history.

And a webpage costs money. Honestly, people should pay me to post pictures and such. If you have to pay to have people view, well honestly that’s just sad. I mean, you don’t see Meryl Streep with a webpage, do you? Well, at least, I couldn’t find it, and I can Gaggle with the best of them.

So, until my reality show deal is finalized, this free blogging thing seems the way to go. It is I, Monique. Raw. Uncensored. I won’t even run spellcheck! It’s the way I roll, or rather the way I walk gracefully in very high heels.